Happy Halloween.
Remember this for the rest of your life. Two mistakes in one day. One unintentionally made and the other is intentional. One after another with only a few minutes in between what you did. Don't ever do it again since you already understand how it feels. Don't try it again. Its so totally not worth it. You don't deserve it so don't dwell upon it. You never know he might have left you a long time ago without you even knowing it. He's moved on so don't look back. Go and have a good life girl. Free yourself from the bondages.